Shipping Forecast or Football Results?

I have two secret ambitions. I know they will never be fulfilled. I would just love to have a go though. I would love to read the football results out on a Saturday afternoon and I would adore it if the BBC asked me to read the Shipping Forecast. Actually perhaps my time is near. James Alexander Gordon who has read the classified football results on a Saturday for eons has retired. Now is my time.

I have no interest in football but it's a dear memory of childhood listening to the rhythmic beat of the announcer reading out all the football results as my brothers listened attentively for the score for Leeds Utd. There was comfort in the methodical singsong. A slight downward inflection for the loser and a tad cheery lilt for the victor. The names were great too especially the Scottish ones. Partick Thistle, Stenhousemuir and Queen of the South. I often thought as a little girl that I quite fancied being queen of the south for the day.

Partick Thistle 1: Queen of the South 1 - apologies if I have the leagues mixed up there. Leeds Utd 27 : Manchester Utd 0 - one there for my brothers! Sorry, David! It's how matter of fact the announcer had to be enunciating with authority and certainty but putting the slightest undulation in the score to keep it interesting and never monotonous.

The shipping forecast is the same. Fabulous names: North Utsire, South Utsire, German Bight, Shannon, Rockall, Malin. The announcer has to be precise, no mistakes, clear as clear can be: lives depend upon it. As a non sailor I have absolutely no idea what it all means but it's music by words. I think it's all about wind direction and visibility and I don't know what but it sounds important and crucial and just a bit mysterious.

I'd be good at either.  Perhaps the BBC will come knocking!

Wild flowers

I visit my mum almost every day. The garden at the elderly people's home she lives in is just lovely. This year the gardeners planted wild flowers - breathtaking and cheering to the soul.

The Build: Week 6

We are still here in the middle of our building site. Lots and lots of activity helped along by the glorious weather. We can see now what the outside will look like and the house does look a lot friendlier for it. Two velux windows went in today in the kitchen - very exciting.

We have been a little preoccupied with our Juliette balcony. If you remember back to my post in March I mentioned how in an ideal world I would have a tower as part of this extension. Second best would have been a full blown balcony which again wasn't possible so we have settled for third best: a Juliette balcony. Actually it's more like a 'Julie' balcony. Due to the pitch of the roof under the balcony we can't quite have full length windows. We have had to settle for three-quarter windows but we are thankful for anything we can get.

David and I have made a full blown, forensic study of Juliette balconies as we have walked around the area. Surprisingly there are quite a lot of them and each and every one has a handle on the outside of the window. Now if you have a proper balcony upon which your butler serves you your morning paper, strong coffee and croissant every summer morning then you may indeed have need for a handle on the door exterior. The butler may gently close the balcony window as he retreats to his duties. Then once you have breakfasted you may have need of said handle on the outside of the door to get back in. But a Juliette door is a door to nowhere. It's a door to ventilation. It's a door with aspirations to being a balcony. A door with a view. You aren't going to cling to the balcony balustrade, close the door and then want to get back in. We are not a superhero Spiderfamily. Why would you need a handle on the outside? It just looks daft and clumsy.

Thus we have set the builder and window maker the task of ensuring there isn't a bloody big handle on the outside of our 'Julie' window which will annoy us to death from the garden. I thought Juliette balcony makers would have this little detail in hand but no. They manufacture these windows with proper handles. No doubt indeed because they are just patio windows but placed one storey or more up. Will keep you posted on the handle controversy.